It’s like Groundhog Day

It’s Saturday afternoon and I’m in Costa again. Although many of you know I do love Costa it’s getting a bit ridiculous now. It’s a regular routine and each day is pretty much like the title of this post. Monday to Friday it’s work, gym, tea, blogging or Netflix then bed. Saturday it’s usually think of a plan for the day or you’ll go mad, Costa, shopping, meet Fiona (my favourite part of the week), blogging or Netflix then bed. Sunday it’s think of a plan for the day or you’ll go mad, gym, blogging or Netflix then bed. I know that a lot of other people have the same routine and I know nobody lives the perfect life but I’m sick of spending time on my own and I’m feeling really claustrophobic. I’m also sick of having to think of things to do just to keep myself busy and not go mad. I guess I’m fed up, my head is all over the place and I need to get this off my chest. I came to the Isle of Man to sort my life out and get sober. I think I’ve done a pretty good job of it and I’ve done 6 months here. I was having a chat about it on the phone last night and the person I was talking to hit the nail on the head. They said “it’s like a long holiday you’ve had and now you’re ready to come home”. I think it’s time I had a plan which involves moving back to the UK. I miss my family and friends more than ever and I just want that close friendship back, obviously without the booze and I think I’m strong enough to do that now. This is how I feel today and I might feel completely different tomorrow but I have found myself wanting to be back home more often than not recently. I started to feel like that after Christmas but at the time I thought things would settle down and I’d get used to being here again. I’ve committed myself to my current contract which ends in October and I also promised myself I’d give it 12 months on the island, which takes me to the middle of September. I’ll probably feel a lot better when I’ve seen my friends and family next weekend, but right now I feel like I’m ranting and I need a plan, like NOW! 😕

One comment

  • busylizzie45

    Just stay strong, it’s 6 sleeps till you are back then only back on the island for a week before you are back for a longer break…I am so proud of you and love you more than I can say…xx

    Liked by 1 person

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